This week I got caught up the fantasy.
You know the one: you’re skinny and life is perfect.
Things do change when you lose weight, that’s for sure. But the important stuff, the happiness stuff, really doesn’t change all that much.
Confidence is not a number on a scale. Happy is not a number on a scale. Life, most certainly, is not a number on a scale.
I’ve been slacking on positive thinking and daily affirmations. I’ve also been feeling uncomfortable in everything. Coincidence? I think not.
When I start believing in the fantasy, crazy thoughts come into my head.
Such as, “I can live on nothing but smoothies and salads.”
Such as, “When I’m finally ‘X’ weight, ‘X’ will be possible.”
A story comes to mind when I get caught up in the fantasy.
It was 2011 and I was in the middle of a phone interview for a job. The recruiter had clearly checked out my LinkedIn profile, because my profile picture on there is of me skydiving on my 21st birthday. I was around 200 pounds.
She asked, “Did you really jump out of a plane?”
“Yes,” I said. “It was awesome.”
“I would love to, but I’d have to lose some weight first,” she replied.
Now, yes, there is a weight limit for sky diving – but she wasn’t anywhere near it. I know, because I had also checked out her LinkedIn profile.
I don’t think you can tell from that photo that I was 200 pounds, if I had known what I know now (i.e. that the job wouldn’t work out) I would have definitely told her how much I weighed in that picture. I would have told her not to let her weight hold her back from taking chances.
It’s this small example that reminds me how much we allow weight to enter into our decisions. To affect the lives we lead.
But it doesn’t have to.
There is a kinder way to live. Free from being weighed down by your weight.
Listen, this kind of thinking happens. I wish I was immune to it, because honestly getting caught up in the fantasy makes living in the real world excruciatingly unpleasant.
It makes you think that there is something missing from your life.
When I’m living in the fantasy, I’m not being grateful for my body.
When I’m living in the fantasy, I’m not being thankful for everything the Universe has given me.
The fantasy is place of pure, quick want when I know that journey I’m on is a slow, winding path.
When you’re ready to give up the fantasy, deal in what you’ve been dealt in life, change can happen. Step out of the fantasy and face the fears that put you there head on because that’s when the life you want, with all the happiness you can manifest, has a chance to become your reality.
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” – Lao Tzu
Starting weight: 243
Last week: 164.5
This week: 162.5